ANGER
1) Anger conditioning can cause inappropriate expressions of anger such as uncontrolled violent outbursts, misdirected anger or repressing all feelings of anger when it would be an appropriate response to the situation.
2) Anger that is constantly “bottled up” can lead to persistent violent thoughts or actions, nightmares and even physical symptoms.
3) Anger can also aggravate an already present mental health problem such as clinical depression.
4) One effect of the depression sufferer's of anger is that their interpersonal relationships are often unhappy and unhealthy
5) Anger can also fan the flames of paranoia and prejudice, even in normal, everyday situations.
6) People tend to express their anger either passively or aggressively through the fight-or-flight response
7) The passive "flight" response is repression and denial of anger for safety or other purposes
Passive anger
Passive anger can be expressed in the following ways:
Secretive behavior, such as stockpiling resentments that are expressed behind people’s backs, giving the silent treatment or under the breath mutterings, avoiding eye contact, putting people down, gossiping, anonymous complaints, poison pen letters, stealing, and conning.
Manipulation, such as provoking people to aggression and then patronizing them, forgiveness, provoking aggression but staying on the sidelines, emotional blackmail, false tearfulness, feigning illness, sabotaging relationships, using sexual provocation, using a third party to convey negative feelings, withholding money or resources.
Self-blame, such as apologizing too often, compromising too often, being overly critical, inviting criticism.
Self-sacrifice, such as being overly helpful, making do with second best, quietly making long suffering signs but refusing help, or lapping up gratefulness.
Ineffectualness, such as setting yourself and others up for failure, choosing unreliable people to depend on, being accident prone, underachieving, expressing frustration at insignificant things but ignoring serious ones.
Dispassion, such as giving the cold shoulder or phony smiles, looking cool, sitting on the fence while others sort things out, dampening feelings with substance abuse, overeating, oversleeping, not responding to another’s anger, frigidity, giving inordinate amounts of time to machines, objects or intellectual pursuits, talking of frustrations but showing no feeling.
Obsessive behavior, such as needing to be clean and tidy, making a habit of constantly checking things, over-dieting or overeating, demanding that all jobs be done perfectly.
Evasiveness, such as turning your back in a crisis, avoiding conflict, not arguing back, becoming phobic.
Well, now I'm more educated about anger and how to control it, it'll be a good education for myself and alot others more. Controlling it too much at times will actually trigger a side effect or even a backfire which results in unexpected outrage/outburst of rage, physically or verbally.
I might be the happy go lucky guy everybody knows but I can be sure that I put on a mask most of the time, it's difficult to see if I'm angered or sad, if it is noticable, back off before something real bad happens, give me time to think and cool down before resuming any conversation.
